Wall of Fog

Definitions and ideas are often more about boundaries than anything else. Children test their parents for weakness, hoping for guidelines. We seek adventure, looking to prove that our limits can be pushed farther. Prejudice and justice are about who is, and is not, within the bounds of law and social order. All of these examples are tested constantly, with one consistent variable... people.

Friendships come and go in sometimes dramatic waves, though the close ones can become like family and last a lifetime. Family you have no choice over and does last forever, leading to a mix of stability and claustrophobia that few friendships can attain.

Romantic relationships are oddly perched between. Few connections can grow so strong so quickly. Few boundaries are tested so rapidly and with so little idea of the outcome. I have never had a long term relationship, but in general... romance seems like a room defined by fog. Somewhere in the ambiguity and skewed perception is the possibility of the most important relationship of your life. It is daunting, it is inspiring and it seems that only those who have already given up hope navigate it easily.

There is a man I like, that I have a connection to. We do not have shared friends, many shared interests or similar backgrounds. He is not my traditional type and I do not know how to anticipate his every move. It could end tomorrow, it could go on till next year or beyond. But I can talk to him and be vulnerable. He can talk to me and be safe. We get to negotiate boundaries as we come upon them. There is so much opportunity to be hurt, probably because there is so much potential for joy. My lingering question is... how do I remain open to something that could end at any moment?